Categories
Debriefings

IT’S NOT THE SKY THAT’S FALLING

Season 25 Tuesday: A new correspondent on the site itself. More falls from the Black Hole – including some early Decrees and Blessings…

filed by Agent Moon

Good timezone agents! We are once again watching the wonderful splort of Blaseball even if nobody has yet stolen a single base. I think it’s broken. Since our last correspondence we have had 11 wins and 12 losses. Spies mid. A few intriguing new developments have occured since the last debrief.

You Have New Messages

A couple new messages have appeared. The first one came from a new user simply named @beat_reporter. They have glasses and a fedora. It’s possible they could be on our payroll. I don’t know though.

Their message contained some facts about the first 7 games, which included the information about Natha Spruce and Kaj Murphy. The post also talked about the other things the Black Hole has spat out, as well as calling out how both the Kansas City Breath Mints and Mexico City Wild Wings had a winning streak, not losing any of their 7 games.

The Wings especially have gone on to do very well so far this season, currently having a record of 23-4. Even the fact that one of their players, James Boy, got knocked away and replaced by falling player Carter O’connor which showed up as Carter O'connor couldn’t stop them.

The @facts_machine also made a return, detailing a few stat leaderboards as of Day 23. The leaderboards included Home Runs, Strikeouts Thrown, Runs Scored, and Runs Allowed. One of our Agents has made an appearance here, as Wyatt Mason IV is tied for 4th for most strikeouts thrown, having thrown 50. Mason had been a pitcher in the past before the Black Hole, so it’s nice to see that they still have it in them.

Votes and Chips, Hold The Fish

As expected, “Universal Bets and Influence” was distributed today. Every Fan received 100 Chips and 20 Votes. If you mess up you can still recover from it.

Right now our supercomputers advise that you should bet on every game, because it will average out to a positive return. Don’t buy Votes until the end of the season.

Even More Falls

The Horizon weather has continued to drop more players over time, although it is still unknown where these players are landing. Some of the players include: Wyatt Owens, Xandra Pancakes, Baby Doyle, Kennedy Loser, Leo Baron, Jacob Haynes, and Richardson Games among others.

Both Xandra Pancakes and Leo Baron fell during Spies games, on Day 17 and Day 20 respectively. Richardson Games, a well known Shoe Thief, fell during a Shoe Thieves game as well. I wonder –

The Debriefings Office’s FK department liaison is making this really weird look at me right now. I think I’m supposed to stop talking.

Familiar Blessing(s)

Yet another belch was detected today. Instead of a Decree falling like yesterday, three new Blessings were dropped for Fans to vote for. These Blessings are:

Strong Start: Sort your Lineup by Batting Rating.

Shadow Play: Swap your worst Player out for someone in your Shadows.

Wind Sprints: Your Team’s Defense and Running are boosted by 1 Star.

The third Blessing, Wind Sprints, is a return from the past. Originally seen in Season 2 of Blaseball Beta, it is notorious for spawning the “vote, wimdy” meme when the Miami Dale won the blessing in Season 4 with less than 1 percent of the vote. Will the blessing get wimdy’d again?

As I was writing this up, another belch happened and yet another Decree was dropped.

Relegation: At the end of every Season, the last place Team’s Roster will be replaced.

This, again, is a new version of an original S1 Decree. This begs the question: will the Forbidden Book return? And if it does, will the fans vote for it again?

Yes. Knowing Blaseball fans, the answer to that question is yes.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.