Spies, I advise you to not look at the standings right now. There has been a shift in the universe; a corruption the likes of which we have never seen before. Our agents are seeking the cause—a rift in the fabric of the universe, a tear in spacetime, a curse buried in the foundation of HQ. So far, we have found nothing. Our work continues, nonetheless.

Our record over the past is… . We have won ten games and nine. This is all according to plan, though perhaps somewhat .

We regret that we must announce the incineration of Agent Yeong-Ho Benitez. Though Benitez has not been with us for some time, their contributions to the field of espionage and information-gathering have been invaluable to us. Rest in Violence, Agent Benitez.

Stay safe, Spies. Perhaps this ending has become too familiar to you and you would prefer to see another—”good day,” maybe, or, But I will continue to say it: stay safe, Spies. Stay safe.

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