filed by Agent O
The influx of information yesterday has been so great that it is now being dubbed “Throwback Thursday”, and new information is still coming. The Spies finished this season with a record of 48-51, which would have been our usual barely squeaking out of the playoffs, but then we were picked as the Overbracket Wild Card. So here we are.
Look. We were trying to stay out of sight for a bit of a rebuilding season. But it is entirely possible that we might win it all. In the one season where we were trying not to win it all.
Feedback Forms Unfilled
We have retained Siobhan Chark even through our last scheduled feedback game on day 90, which means that unless something ridiculous happens during the Championships, she’s on our team until next season. Or, you know, Wills could happen, depending on what people decide to vote for. And she’s still Flickering. Those Flickering Socks…!
During the same game, Reese attempted to feedback with Hendricks Richardson, but the Hellmouth Sunbeams were soundproof, which means that Reese was Tangled instead. Being Tangled in feedback – having a feedback attempt fail – reduced their stats. We have seen tangling happen once before; NaN was no-selled from feedbacking onto the Charleston Shoe Thieves. But we’re only the second time this happened.
Alex returned from Elsewhere unscattered. They were promptly attacked by a Consumer, which broke their Underhanded helmet. In general, Consumers were plentiful this lateseason… though they are now basically absent in this postseason, due to some interesting idol board manipulation I will explain in a moment.
Bennett Bluesky and also four other players’ shared Clutch Wooden Rock Ring was repaired by salmon, exposing an interesting entanglement between all the instances of this ring; this one salmoning repaired the durability on everyone’s rings at once, in the same way that one of them damaging the ring also damaged everyone else’s.
Balloons are now worth 1/10 of their previous eDensity negation value.
Evelton McBlase II has been faxed out for Joshua Watson. Since Eve is still Roaming, this does not in fact defeat the evil. People were definitely celebrating it, though.
Our wildcarding does at least come with an excellent prize. Our latest shadows postseason birth, Aoife Mahle, is a good batter: they have good underlying stats, not just a good star rating. That thwackability rating is making the statheads salivate. They will be an excellent voicemail batter reliever.
Meanwhile, Gloria Bugsnax of the Boston Flowers is the new hotness for idol board shenanigans, because xe sure did steal a Soul. The way the Idol Board “Noodle” works is that the total eDensity of all the players above the line has to match the total eDensity of all the players below the line. Bugsnax is presently skimming the bottom of the idol board. This drags the noodle way, way down. And when the noodle is lower, the “water” level is lower, and thus it takes more eDensity to sink into consumer territory.
Also we, uh, we won the wildcard round? 2 games to 0 against the Worms? And are now advancing?
Wild. Absolutely wild.
As per usual, the MVP selection on day 99 was accompanied by a god speech. This one was by Crates, who said (among other things):
“Upstream, Banks are trawled […]
“Echoes across Eras”
“In the name of Fairness
The Current Dammed
Mistakes repeated, huh? I have seen a theory that this means that we may be able to access the Vaulted players from a past era. We will see soon enough.
Wait, There’s Two Of Them?
A newly uncovered library entry has revealed that the Baltimore Crabs were in the original Ultra League Blaseball. But these are not the Crabs we know. This is an entirely different team that happens to also be called the Baltimore Crabs. They show up on a page completely separate from the Baltimore Crabs, have an entirely different player list, and sport an entirely different slogan: “Crab and Go!” Crabs fans have reacted with general consternation.
Speaking of newly revealed teams, the Phoenix Trunks also… existed? They aren’t in the Hall either. Where did they go?
The first election of season A has now been entirely revealed. Firstly, in two results from what I can only describe as Decrees, Ultra League Blaseball was renamed Internet League Blaseball. Also, the Bad League was renamed the Evil League.
Only four other election results are visible, with Crates’ commentary included in quotation marks (also visible in the source).
The Hawai’i Fridays Hexed Parker MacMillan with Non-Profit.
The Antarctic Fireballs Hexed Parker MacMillan with Firewalker.
“A Rock and a Hard Place.”
The Alaskan Immortals Infused Parker MacMillan 8%.
The Baltimore Crabs stole Megan Ito from The Breath Mints. They sent back Cory Terermorphasis.
Collusion?, eh? Were both teams targeting the same player on purpose?
And what’s with the rock and hard place thing?
This is a page in the middle of a story where both the before and the after are missing. As more information comes in, it will eventually make sense. The Agency will see to that.
The “ECHOED Megan Ito” message that I brought up yesterday has now had more of its context revealed. It appears that Megan Ito, having the force field, ended up trapped in a cycle between entering the Hall of Flame, being Forced to stay in the ILB, entering the Hall of Flame, being forced to stay in the ILB… Megan Ito was caught in a state of superposition, and thus an Alternate was called. This Alternate has a new player page under the name “New Megan Ito”. And New Megan Ito is extremely good.
After another redacted feed event, instability chained to the New York Millennials. And yes, I checked the link; those are in fact our New York Millennials. It is presently unclear (or, at least, too classified for me to see) what happened, but the redacted feed event that goes in between the Alternation and the Instability already has 851 fish on it, so we may find an answer soon.