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Debriefings

WE ARE VERY NORMAL

It is the middle of the , Spies. I have checked and rechecked the data. I have run the calculations, the simulations, more times than I can count. I have asked Math Velazquez to verify. And yet, inexplicably, our win- ratio for the past remains a positive fifteen wins to nine . There are many […]
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Debriefings

GET ASTRO’S TURF

Season eight has begun. We encourage you to look at the standings. What is that you spy there? Is that the Spies not just slightly above the Dale in rankings, but actually one full slot ahead of them? It is. This is due in large part to our eleven wins to nine over the past […]
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Debriefings

GOODBYE MCBLASE

Welcome to season eight, Spies. Once again, the Spies have managed to avoid gaining any blessings. This is a concentrated effort and not reflective of small team size or . We simply did not want them. Ask anybody. We did, however, manage to get rid of that Evelton McBlase II. Through a cunning strategy coordinated […]
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Debriefings

PARTY IN AN UNDISCLOSED LOCATION

Welcome to the postseason, Spies. , the previous ‘s events have been… dramatic. Let’s begin with the most relevant: the Spies won four games and five, sending us into Party Time. The Party never stops for Agent Reese Clark, who has asked for utter and complete silence as they recover from two solid days of […]
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Debriefings

NECROMANCY MAY BE A “BAD” IDEA

It’s the end of Season 7, Spies, and we are officially ready to . Over the last , the Spies amassed 13 wins and 10 . Our recent agent recruitment efforts seem to be paying off, even if we did get by the Tacos. On day 76, we shamed the Tacos . In return, the […]
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Debriefings

LETTUCE REJOICE

Good morning, Spies. It seems that carries significant consequences. This is your annual reminder that all attempts at must be approved by a supervisor with -level clearance. We acknowledge that this is given that clearance level is but you’re Spies, it’s your to figure it out. We have once again achieved the perfect win- balance […]
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Debriefings

DEBT COLLECTION

Once again we reach our patented , Spies. Our positive win- ratio has been upended, and the past ‘s record is now 7-16. The Spies’ performance aside, the past has resulted in numerous lineup shifts. Jaylen Hotdogfingers, newly resurrected, began occasionally hitting players with pitches. Now, it seems, the debt incurred by returning from the […]
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Debriefings

WE ARE INCAPABLE OF WORRY

A new season has officially begun. Thanks to our finely honed skills and flawless execution, the Spies have a positive win- ratio to start season seven: 12 to 8. Remember: any past were an intentional part of the plan, and not reflective of low star ratings, , or any factor other than our own intentions. […]
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Debriefings

WE ARE NOT CRYING

Welcome to a new season, Spies. The previous election has caused quite a stir within the League. The Garages successfully performed on Jaylen Hotdogfingers, drawing them back from beyond the veil. In return, Mike Townsend, pitcher, has stepped into the . The Spies received two Blessings for this season: Evelton McBlase II (a duplicate of […]
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Debriefings

THE FABLED THIRD STRIKE

Welcome to playoff season, Spies. This year we will not be participating in the playoffs, as our skills are best used elsewhere. There is no other reason. Certainly not yesterday’s two wins to five truly abysmal . All is going according to plan. Though the Spies have been from this season due to our immensely […]